Hello world! Today marks several milestones post-surgery (everything went well; there will be posts up soon on http://mybiglife.com/adventures-of-a-lap-band-it/ that go into more detail). I’m going out on my own for the first time, driving a car for the first time, and (wah wahhh) going back to work. A little bit. Just easing myself into it, but still.
And since going off heavy duty painkillers seems to mean I can’t sleep the night through, I’m also exhausted, and my mental processes have run their course.
**Update: New post is up: Five Days Post-Op | Adventures of a Lap Band-It http://bit.ly/11UbBt
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I’m feeling super stressed today. I’m stressed by what I’m not eating, I’m stressed by jobs, money, and travel. I need a job that pays more money than the one I’m working on now, but whether that’s to work in conjunction with or in place of the current job I’m not sure yet. I’m just itching for a change.
Obviously, I’m going to get one–a BIG one–soon. With the surgery. But I still have this unshakable desire to grab my life by the lapels and shake it til it turns blue or til I’m satisfied.
And Loose, which I wrote the first several pages of, is already lacking that can’t-help-but-keep-writing feeling that I’m kind of addicted to. I don’t know what’s wrong. I don’t know if the really intimate first person/borderline stream of consciousness narrative is proving hard to direct, or if its the fact that I’m writing about places that really exist but that I haven’t been too that’s the issue. Something’s just not fun about it. Of course, it could be all the other STRESSORS!! that are sucking the fun out of writing suddenly.
One things for sure: no matter how much it will end up costing, Chicago is going to be the best thing ever. I desperately need a change of pace and place, rhythm and routine. Even if I am exhausted for most of it.
I also have one appointment set up with a temping agency this week, and possibly another one TBA. I like the idea of temping, because, lets face it, when its not writing, I don’t have a very long attention span for any kind of work. I like to switch it up and play around, and temping might be just the ticket.
::Sigh:: What’s new with you?
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So, I took the day off completely, after about a week or more of insanity, and I replaced all my sheets last night, fluffed my pillows, resettled my down comforter (which inevitably balls up in a corner of my bed) and settled down to rest. My dog hopped into bed with me (and back out again later), and I slept til six am, with her yipping at me because she thought it was time to play (my mom was playing with her before work and she decided I should get in on the fun). After that, I went back to bed, slept til nine thirty, and luxuriated in bed, catching up on some reading and not setting foot out of bed until 1145.
All I can say is aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh.
I’m just taking some time to decompress. Life has been really crazy lately, so I’m planning an actual, albeit ultra brief vacation that will coincide with my surgery recovery (if I have to sit around and do nothing I might as well do it with friends). I have lots of work to get back to tomorrow, and in the mean time I’ve been doing a lot of work for MyBigLife.com, which you will get to see once the site goes live (it includes video blogging, which I’m still getting the hang of, so be nice!).
I just get the sense that my life, after stagnating for so long, is moving again. It may be a fast ride, but at least it’s going somewhere. So hang on!
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